The Science of Cow Tipping
Is it really possible to push a 1400 pound cow over? If so, why the hell would anyone want to do such a thing?
Dr. Margo Lillie, zoologist for the University of British Columbia, and her student, Tracy Boechler, have decided to use real facts and good math to see if cow tipping is indeed possible.
Here are all the variables:
The Redneck: Take a 6 foot man, with the average horizontal push force of 656 newtons of force. He must be stealthy, and swift. I find this impossible, as the rednecks that partake in this activity are usually wasted.
The Cow: Average weight of a cow, 1400 pounds. Here's another misconception - cows don't sleep standing up, like horses do. If they're standing up, they're usually just taking a power nap. If the drunk redneck were to accidentally attempt to tip a bull...all hell would break loose and THAT would be fun to watch.
According to Dr. Lillie, to tip a cow that's 24.3 degrees relative to the ground, it would take 2910 newtons of force. That's too much force for one person, very possible with 4.3 people. Other calculations showed that's perhaps two strong people could do it, on a small cow, but only if the cow remained absolutely still and the drunk athletes exerted amazing force simultaneously. They did not allow for moonshine to enter their equation.
So for those rednecks and other morons out there wanting to try cow tipping, solid physics and math shows that while it's possible to do it...it will take a clear mind, a sharp push, and the ability to sneak up on a dozing cow. All these factors make it extremely tough to do. I highly recommend discontinuing the cow tipping efforts and focus on another more accessible sport.
Try Cow Chip Tossing. I hear it's all the rage in Oklahoma. The record, by the way, is held by Leland Searcy who chucked a chip 182 feet, 3 inches in 1979. Now that is talent.